You Need a Follow Up Conversation with Your Lurking Cousin

You call your lurking paternal female cousin and you go to town on her. She tells you you're rambling. But you ask her why she's been following you around for the last 5-10 years of your life. Our Job, my home. She said she didn't even know I lived in Fairwood. You know this isn't true. She asked where you lived when she found you at WMATA. And Golds is "her gym". The same gym you can see from your living room window. She lives in DC. You tell her this isn't even the best gym. There are better ones 5 mins from her home in Riverdale Park. A new one.

She starts to stutter. You asked her why she introduced you to this psycho next door. She keeps doubling down on "you said you liked him". And I did think he was cute for like 3 months. But you told her you knew something was wrong when he started to open and shut doors, follow you in his truck and come outside when you're doing your Turo business.

"Call the Police"

She tells you to call the police. You remind her that the last time police were involved you ended up in a mental ward.

You wonder now if baiting you to call the police, furthers the insanity narrative. Now you're almost sure it does.